Monster Monday: Pangolins, Armor-Covered Anteaters

Today's Monster Monday is the pangolin, also known as the spiny anteater.  Pangolins are small insectivorous mammals covered in thick overlapping scales.  They curl up into a defensive ball like an armadillo, presenting a front of spiny armor plates to any predators trying to bite them.  There are about eight species of pangolins ranging across Africa, India, Southeast Asia, and South China.  The smaller species of pangolin tend to be tree-dwellers, using their sharp claws and prehensile armored tails to navigate life in the branches, while the larger ones are ground-dwellers and burrowers.  Tree pangolins also tend to be good swimmers; they suck in extra air in their stomach and then glide through the water with an undulating motion.

Giant Pangolin, by Joseph Wolf (1865), via Wikimedia

Of course I statted up both the tree and ground pangolins, because more is always better.  Tree pangolins make a great (and adorable) choice of familiar for wizards and witches that hail from tropical climes.

A tree pangolin hanging by its tail, via Wikimedia

Of course, because pangolins are covered with natural armor, they have occasionally been used to make armor for humans.  Consider pangolin hide armor for those who adventure in tropical settings.

Pangolin shield; Wikimedia

Pangolin armor; Wikimedia

The following text in gold is available as Open Game Content under the OGL. Open Game Content is ©2017 Jonah Bomgaars.

Monster Monday: Terrestrisuchus & Saltoposuchus, Little Running Crocs

Today's Monster Monday is a two-fer: the greyhound-like prehistoric crocodilians terrestrisuchus and saltoposuchus.

by Nobu Tamura, via Wikimedia

Terrestrisuchus gracilis

Both of these prehistoric crocodylomorphs were built for speed, galloping across the landscape and snapping up prey on the run.  They may have even been able to rise up on their hind legs.  Their lifestyle must have born little resemblance to that of the crocodilians we are familiar with today (though modern crocs can certainly put on astounding bursts of speed).  The smaller terrestrisuchus gracilis was about three feet long including its tail, which made up about half its total length.  Saltoposuchus connectens was similarly built but larger, reaching almost five feet in length.  Both creatures inhabited Late Triassic Europe, which had a hot and dry climate, meaning these speedy crocs probably dashed across sand dunes and arid plains.  Their physiological similarities, combined with the fact that they existed at roughly the same time and in roughly the same place, have led to the suggestion that terrestrisuchus was simply a juvenile saltoposuchus, which is certainly plausible.

by Nobu Tamura, via Wikimedia

Saltoposuchus connectens

Why stat up both of these running reptiles?  Terrestrisuchus is just the right size and challenge rating to be a familiar, while saltoposuchus is large and powerful enough to serve as a threat for low-level adventurers.  Think of it as the difference between a rat familiar and a dire rate: one of them could hang out with a wizard or possibly attack in a swarm, the other can fight a beginning adventuring party alone or in a small pack.

But mostly, of course, I statted them both up because I love prehistoric life and I want as much of it as possible available for GMs to use in their campaigns.

The following text in gold is available as Open Game Content under the OGL. Open Game Content is ©2016 Jonah Bomgaars.

Monster Monday: Beaver and Dire Beaver - Those Dam Rodents

Today's Monster Monday is a twofer: the humble beaver and the moderately less humble dire beaver which had six-inch teeth and was roughly the size of a black bear.  Why am I talking about dire beavers like they were a real thing?  Because they were.  Castoroides leiseyorum roamed southern North America 1.4 million years ago.  Its relative, Castoroides ohioensis ranged across what is now the northern United States and Canada from about 130,000 years ago up to at least 18,000 years ago.  Ice Age North America wasn't just mastodons and saber-toothed cats; we had all kinds of crazy shit, like cheetahs and camels and saber-toothed salmon.

fossil C. ohioensis skeleton, via Wikimedia

There is some debate among paleontologists as to whether Castoroides built lodges and dams.  The shape of their teeth would have made them less efficient at cutting down trees than modern beavers, but it is known that a closely related genus of prehistoric beaver (Dipoides) built lodges, and a Castoroides fossil was found in association with what may have been a giant lodge in 1912.  Regardless of paleontology, the dire beaver statted up below definitely builds giant beaver dams and lodges, because that is too cool.  Modern normal-sized beavers have a tremendous effect on their local ecosystems by creating artificial ponds.  Imagine that but an order of magnitude greater.  Giant beaver dams would create huge ponds that attract all sorts of other creatures, from mundane fish and birds to nixies and shambling mounds.  A giant beaver dam might flood valuable farmland, creating conflict between farmers and the local circle of druids.  An older giant beaver dam might have become corrupted, home to oozes, aberrations, and - of course - skeletal dire beavers.

Lest we forget, normal-sized beavers are statted up below as well.  While they are less likely to serve as foes for low-level adventurers, beavers can act as familiars, granting their master a +3 bonus on Knowledge (engineering) checks.  They can also be prime targets for hunters and trappers, as they were in real life.  Beavers were historically prized for their water-repellent fur, which was used to make, among other things, top hats.  Beavers - both North American and European - have also traditionally been hunted for their castoreum, the secretion of the scent glands.  Castoreum is used in perfumery and in some traditional medicines.  In the Middle Ages, it was even used to increase the production of honeybees.  Any hunter or trapper who bags a beaver stands to profit not only from its fur but also its extracted castoreum.  Fun fact: because the castor glands are located near the beaver's testes, an ancient legend first attested in the works of Aesop but carried on by ancient and medieval naturalists says that beavers will gnaw off their own ballsacks to escape hunters.

via Wikimedia

The following text in gold is available as Open Game Content under the OGL. Open Game Content is ©2016 Jonah Bomgaars.

Monster Monday: Jackalope, the Horned Rabbit of the West

Wikimedia

Unlucky Jackalope - Spica, Kansas

Today's Monster Monday is the jackalope - that classic mythological critter of the American West - a jackrabbit with the antlers of a pronghorn antelope.  I felt I would be remiss not to offer the jackalope as an option for wizard familiars in my wild west Guns of the Western Kings setting.

Jackalopes are a classic example of rogue taxidermy, a term used to describe the piecing together of animal parts from different animals to create a fictional, chimerical creature.  I had always assumed - somewhat romantically - that the jackalope arose out of tall tales told around campfires out on the trail, and that the taxidermied jackalopes had grown out of these tales.  As it turns out, the jackalope was invented in 1932 by a boy named Douglas Herrick of (coincidentally) Douglas, Wyoming, who was learning taxidermy by mail-order.  He sold his piece of rogue taxidermy to a local hotelier, who displayed it as a tourist attraction.  Stories of jackalopes took off from there.  While it may not be a piece of true mythology, the jackalope certainly has an important place in constructed folklore, similar to the wild haggis in Scotland or drop bears in Australia.

Although jackalopes are a modern invention, they follow in a long line of similar feats of rogue taxidermy and actual belief in what was called the lepus cornutus, or horned rabbit.  In 1933, one year after the creation of the first known jackalope, American virologist Richard Shope discovered Shope papilloma virus (or Kappapapillomavirus 2) which causes keratinous, hornlike growths on rabbits in the wild.  This may be the origin of early mythological expressions of of the lepus cornutus, like the Arabian al-mi'raj, a rabbit with a unicorn horn.  Almiraj has existed as a monster in Dungeons & Dragons since the original Fiend Folio published in 1981, and was added to Pathfinder in Bestiary 4.  As medieval bestiaries gave way to naturalist studies in the Early Modern period, the lepus cornutus made the transition as well, probably buoyed by sightings of rabbits with Shope papilloma virus.

Wikimedia

lepus cornutus (center) in Animalia Qvadrvpedia et Reptilia (Terra),
painted in the late 16th century

The horned rabbit continued to appear in scientific works into the early 19th century, probably last given credence in the 1817 Nouveau dictionnaire d'histoire naturelle, which considers the creature to be possibly real but very rare.  This may have also encouraged another example of rogue taxidermy, the wolpertinger, a horned and winged rabbit, often with other animal bits added for good measure.  The wolpertinger serves a similar role in Alpine Bavaria as the Jackalope in the American West - as a local curiosity displayed in hotels and pubs and a focal point for tall tales told to tourists.  The wolpertinger entered Pathfinder in Adventure Path #61: Shards of Sin, along with a similar flying Swedish rabbit called a skvader.

The following text in gold is available as Open Game Content under the OGL. Open Game Content is ©2016 Jonah Bomgaars.

Monster Monday: Slow Loris, the Primate with the Poison Bite

Everyone turned to stare when the wizard entered the bar.  Magic types didn't often show up in this part of town, especially not ones dressed so fancy.  The spindly caster leaned on an intricately carved staff tipped with gleaming jewels.  His long blue robes were finely tailored and trimmed with gold.  His ink-black calfskin boots, lightly caked with fresh street-mud, otherwise showed no signs of wear.  And, most peculiarly, he had a furry, cat-sized creature clinging to his shoulder, gripping his robes with little human-like fingers and staring around with round eyes like silver thalers.

He didn't look like he belonged here in the Bilge and Bunyon, but he sure seemed to know what he wanted.  "Ratcatcher!" he shouted, storming toward the chubby Shadow Guild operative's table.  Three toughs stood simultaneously to bar the wizard's passage, but Ratcatcher waved them away.  One of them succeeded in taking the wizard's staff away, but the intruder didn't seem to mind.

"What brings you to my humble table today, Harmac?"

"You know damn well, Rat.  Where is it?"

Ratcatcher leaned back, his stout chair creaking like an old ship.  "I'm afraid I'm not a mind-reader, Harmac.  Maybe you fancy magic boy types forget we aren't all arcanely attuned."  The wizard seemed angry.  Ratcatcher drummed his sausage-like fingers on the table, showing off his many magic rings as a subtle reminder that he was warded against any spells Harmac might try on him.

"The idol, you greasy slop bucket!  Give me back the idol!"  Ratcatcher's bruisers shifted awkwardly behind the wizard, unsure when they should step in.

"I don't know anything about any idols.  I do know that tomb robbing is not looked kindly on by the authorities of this district, and Artaklan antiquities can only be claimed as private property with the appropriate documents of sale and provenance.  Do you have any such documents?"

Harmac reached across the table with surprising speed, hoisting Ratcatcher up by the collar.  With his other hand, he grabbed his sleepy looking pet by the scruff of the neck and shoved it in the thief's face.  "This is Lola," the wizard explained.  "She's a loris: the only species of monkey with a poisonous bite.  And once she latches on, she doesn't let go."

Lola slowly blinked.

"Urk... Don't monkeys usually got tails?"

Two of Ratcatcher's hired goons grabbed the wizard and yanked him away.  As Ratcatcher fell back into his chair, Harmac lobbed the primate at him and yelled, "Sic 'im, Lola!"

The creature, so placid a second ago, hissed wickedly and sunk its needle fangs into the thief's blubbery neck.  Ratcatcher shook his head wildly and slapped at the beast, but it only clamped down harder.  "Yeeooww!" he screeched.  Still trying to pry the simian assailant off with one hand, he reached into a leather satchel with the other and threw a jade idol across the table.  "Take the damn idol, ya crazy wizard!  Just get yer thrice-cursed pet off me!"

Harmac pushed the bruisers away from him, straightened his robes, and whistled two short notes.  Lola unclamped her jaw from the fat man's neck and waddled across the table, grabbing the idol along the way.

Ratcatcher cursed and rubbed the red swelling on his neck.  "You owe me 2500 thalers for the rock, Harmac.  I see you again and you don't got the money, you and yer little tree-rat are dead!"

Turning for the door, Harmac grabbed his staff and gave Lola an appreciative scratch under the chin.  "Pleasure doing business with you!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today's Monster Monday is the slow loris, the world's only venomous primate!  Okay, technically it isn't venom but a toxic, allergenic compound secreted by a gland of the animal's armpit that activates when mixed with the loris' saliva, supplemented by their diet of poisonous plants, but that takes longer to say.  And technically slender lorises have the same toxic defense system as the slow loris, but people know about slow lorises because they've been in a bunch of youtube videos.  Call me when you're an internet sensation, slender lorises.

via Wikimedia

Also, unlike what certain wizards and thieves in the above story snippet may have suggested, lorises aren't monkeys; they are more closely related to lemurs.

The following text in gold is available as Open Game Content under the OGL. Open Game Content is ©2016 Jonah Bomgaars.

Monster Monday: The d20 Despot Aviary

Hello, dear readers. I hope you like birds!  For today's Monster Monday entry, I'm bringing you five species of birds, four of which make suitable familiars for your more wizardly characters.  So strap in for excitement as I present: a cassowary, a heron, a chicken, a duck, and a hummingbird.

Keep in mind that all of these are dinosaurs          (c)d20 despot

The following text in gold is available as Open Game Content under the OGL. Open Game Content is (C)2014 Jonah Bomgaars.